Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to squirt coffee up your asshole using this $135 glass jarOn January 8, 2018 by Maybell
Goop is Gwyneth Paltrow’s life-threatening, wallet-flensing empire of woo, home to smoothie dust, vulva steaming, rocks you keep in your vagina, and a raft of rebadged products that are literally identical to the garbage Alex Jones sells to low-information preppers.
But as stupid as coffee enemas are, they’re even stupider when accomplished by means of Goop’s, $135 “Implant O’Rama,” manufactured by Implant O’Rama LLC. It’s a $135 glass jar with a couple silicon hoses attached to it.
If you don’t want to fill your rectum with coffee, Gwyneth also recommends “detoxing” by drinking out of a $350 rose gold crazy straw, applying $85 “wellness oil,” drinking from a $84 water bottle with a positive energy crystal jutting proudly from its base, or carrying a $85 shaman bag of “magically charged stones” (at least you carry these in the shaman bag, instead of your birth canal).
Yes, Goop suggests that a coffee enema is a “clutch” way to “supercharge” your “annual goop detox” and start the year in tip-top health. In its latest guide for “deep detoxification,” the Goop team recommends a device called an “Implant O’Rama” for squirting coffee up your keister at home. The product, sold by Implant O’Rama LLC for a bargain $135, is merely a glass bottle with silicone tubing attached.
In “triumph of ignorance,” Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop touts $135 coffee enema [Beth Mole/Ars Technica]
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